Do What Now?

If any of you knit, crochet or know someone who does, why not get involved and help out OFA (Orphan Foundation of America) and work up some red scarves for the college freshman!

I came across this site and thought I'd give it a go. Besides, I remember what it was like to be a college freshman (I learned quickly how to sell my meal tickets for beer, which resulted in me living off stove top stuffing for a month). All that's besides the point though, having something homemade is an added extra touch to the shock of "holy shit, I'm in college."   It's a great way to give back, pay it forward, however you chose to label it. 

However,The scarves MUST be RED. 

Of course, there are variations of red (maroon, reddish brown, blood red, etc).  They ask that you don't send any other color and that you're scarf is free of fancy stuff (yknow, that furry shit the magic scarves are made of? No.)  You can learn more about it by following the handy dandy link I'm including:

RED SCARF PROJECT

Thanks guys!

xo

Any of you out there have any job finding sites that are legit?

I'm seriously tired of the clicking game.

And Craigslist might be out for me- especially after the last job I applied for, the guy wanted me to buy electronics and mail them to him in Ireland.  Pay? $400.00 a MONTH.   Yeah, like I'm an idiot.

Anyone need a personal assistant, desk jockey, funny, whitty, charming, fashionista of an employee?

(ie: I NEED A JOB, PLEASE HELP).

For the past few weeks, Miles has been asking me to make him a sack doll. 

Yeah.

At first, I was all, 'What exactly is a sack doll?"  In my mind, I'm thinking a pair of testicles with a squiggly mouth or something.  Apparently, a "sack doll" is a knitted creature, filled with beads of some sort.  Think Voodoo doll, only sweeter and more unique.

Where my kid came up with this, I have no idea.  Knowing him, he probably saw it on the internet while researching more information on what LSD is and other urban legends about Pink Floyd.  Which reminds me, I need to get those parental controls up and running on this laptop.

So anyway,
He goes on and on and on about these sack dolls.  Last night, while rummaging around the bookstore, he comes up to me with this box.  You know how bookstores do- always selling kits of different varieties.  There's the Office Space kit, the Office Voodoo kit (which I've been a previous owner of), henna kits, drawing, sketching, clay kits and then this one.

The Plush-o-Rama Curious Creatures for Immature Adults kit.

Is my kid trying to tell me something? Obviously. 

I mull it over, weighing in what kind of commitment this project might take.  Miles tells me I can make him a plush creature in lieu of learning how to knit a sack doll.  Well, Thank God son! Because I was seriously freaking out about learning how to knit a small circle. 

I fork over the $20 bucks for the kit and we walk out of there. 

And hours later, somewhere close to midnight, I'm finishing up the body to my first plush creature.  And of course I did this shit by hand because hellooooo.... I lost my sewing machine somewhere between the trifecta of Nashville-Jackson-Atlanta. 

As I tucked Miles in with this odd shaped fabric monster last night, we made up a game plan.  We're going to the fabric store today for the right kind of string, the proper buttons, the most stellar fabric.  Then when we get home, he's going to sketch the monsters, pick out their fabric and I'll sew it together.

IT'S BRILLIANT!

You're dying to know what this creature looks like, aren't you?  Well, lucky for you, I woke up at six thirty (read: 6:30) to sew on a button eye and make a jacked up mouth. 

Be gentle, it's my first time, mmmkay?

The (nameless) Creature

1 comment

Have any of y'all out there used Craigslist?

Pros/Cons?

Talk amongst the comments, it'll help me decide on whether to use their site or haul shit to the dumpster.

I just made supper (with leftovers) for the three of us for eighteen bucks.  Granted, I had the soy, ginger and garlic at home.  To add a little "more" to the stir-fry, I added fresh shrimp (I sauteed mine, but I'm sure you can toss in frozen shrimp.  Although, I avoid the frozen shrimp at all cost due to a bad run in with it and beer, don't ask).

Anyway, it was hella tasty and healthy (I'm so sick of supper feeling like a punch to the gut and bogging me down), so I wanted to share.  Plus, the whole thing took maybe ten minutes to whip up!  Oh, alright, I started the rice before I went to the store. Heh.

Shiitake Stir-Fry

3oz fresh shiitake mushrooms
1 tbsp canola oil (I used olive oil)
2 large carrots, thinly sliced
1 medium onion, sliced (or diced if you prefer)
1/2 cup vegetable broth
2 tsp minced garlic
2 tsp fresh ginger, minced
1 tbsp low-sodium soy sauce
1/4 tsp sea salt
1/2 cup fresh or frozen edamame (shelled)
1 tsp cornstarch
2 tbsp cold water
2 cups hot cooked brown rice

How To Cook It, That Is, If You're Unfamiliar With A Stove:

One: Prepare mushrooms by cutting off and discarding stems (unless you like to save them for whatever reason.  Maybe necklaces, earrings or voodoo practice?) Thinly slice the caps.

Two:  Heat a wok or large saucepan over medium heat and add oil; add carrots and onions and sautee for 4-5 minutes ( or if you're me, continue to ask your husband, 'Does this look done? How about now? Now? Is this burnt?).  Add mushrooms, broth, garlic, ginger, soy sauce and sea salt and stir to combine.  Bring to a simmer and stir in edamame.  Return to a simmer and cook, uncovered, for 5 minutes, stirring often (and continue to ask husband, 'Do you think it's ready yet? Is it okay if the carrots are still hard?).

Three: Meanwhile, dissolve cornstarch in cold water.  When veggies are almost done cooking, stir in cornstarch mixture and continue cooking about 30 seconds, stirring constantly until liquid thickens. 

Serve with hot brown rice.

YUM!

And if you're interested in the nutritional aspect of it all, here ya go!  But keep in mind this is without the shrimp:

Per serving (3/4 cup veggies and 1/2 cup rice)
Calories: 212
Total fat: 6g
Sat fat: 1g
Trans fat: 0g
Carbs: 36g
Fiber: 5g
Protein: 6g
Sugars: 4g
Sodium: 442mg
Cholesterol: 0mg

While I was scooping cheese into little dixie cups this morning at work, sipping on a carton of chocolate milk, I started to wonder how it dawned on people to actually drink milk.  

Was it the action of watching a newborn drink from it's mother's tit?  And who was the town fool to go and put his mouth on a cow's tit (excuse me, udder)?  Was he ridiculed and beat down? Is there any record of any of this?

And speaking of milk, one of my girlfriend's told me that Peta is wanting Ben & Jerry's to use breast milk in their formula instead of cow's milk.  Now, I haven't researched this, so I'm not sure if there's any merit to this story or not.  But could you imagine? 

Breast milk tastes like shit (well, to us adults, unless you're one of the rare few who have a fetish for it).  I couldn't imagine eating ice cream from breast milk and how are they going to actually acquire all that breast milk?  If the story is true, then Peta is wanting the cruelty to the cows to stop by the way we extract allllll that milk for alllll that ice cream.  Okay, I can see the point in that- animal cruelty blah blah blah.

But is hooking a bunch of lactating women to breast pumps not seen as cruel?  Unless of course, they came up with synthetic breast milk, which would be formula and who the fuck wants to eat Cherry Garcia made out of Carnation formula?

No one sane enough, that's who.

So...

I think I'm going to research how drinking milk was thought up and while I'm at it, I'll check on cheese too.  If any of you have some insight on the topic, please feel free to let me know.